Ode to Janice Kapp Perry

I slept terrible last night. Not crazy sleep, just unsatisfying sleep. I had the kind of night when you wake up every hour or two all. night. long.

I came home yesterday from work (yes, I passed my real estate exam and am now a licensed broker working my little heart out at a real brokerage!) and found Daren sick - sick- sick. He had the stomach flu. Generally, I leave people alone that have the flu. I sympathize from the other room.

So, at bedtime, I slept in the open bed in another room.

There is an open bed in our house. Andrew left on Tuesday afternoon and entered the M.T.C. Wednesday morning.

I walked into his room which still has the sorted piles of clothes to send to Connecticut in three weeks; the boxes of clothes to store for his return in two years; the unmade bed. He'd been gone 24 hours and I already missed him.

I climbed into the bed for sleep, but it eluded me. I thought of Andrew and wondered what he might be doing at that moment in his new room at the M.T.C. I wondered if he was talking to his companion; sharing stories of college, of family and where they were from.

I knew he was thinking of us. He's on unfamiliar ground. I prayed again for the Spirit to comfort him and reassure him.

Then, I thought of our lovely Family Home Evening held Monday night where we shared our testimonies with each other of this Gospel. The same Gospel that requires 19 year old boys, including my son, to become men. There were tears of sadness, but also tears of joy. The Spirit was so strong, it was inspiring and comforting.

When it was Andrew's turn to speak at Family Home Evening, he told us of his thoughts about "time." He said that a mission was "a long time." And it is a long time to be away from family, from friends and familiar things. He will miss Paige's high school graduation and when he comes home, Maddi will be attending youth dances. Our dog Buddy could be dead!

But, he said, when he thinks about what he has been called to do, he realizes that "this time is important time". Time where he will let go of childish things; where he moves forward into becoming who he is meant to be. It will be a time of incredible growth. His testimony will be strengthened.

At that moment, I couldn't have been more proud. He gets it. He's growing up.

As I laid in his bed last night, I realized why I feel so much emotion. I realized my time as a mother has come. My children are growing up and my role is being redefined. I take care of them differently now.

I am growing up too.

And, that Janice Kapp Perry . . . she said it best.